Sometimes you meet someone, and you immediately know: this is love. But the other person may not always immediately see how wonderful the person in front of them is. That's why it's good to know that there are some strategies that can help make the other person fall in love with you. All you can do is try to create the right conditions, and then wait and see what happens.
Method 1 of 6: Being worth loving
Step 1. Take care of yourself
Your appearance plays a major role in whether or not you are found attractive by others. Other people can immediately see how well you take care of your health and appearance, so it's worth investing a little extra time and energy. If you look unkempt, the other person may not be interested in you.
To make sure you look your best, you need to exercise, eat healthy, keep yourself clean and wear clean, flattering clothes
Step #2. Get out there and do things
If you usually do nothing, find something to give your life purpose and direction. Take up a new hobby, join a sports club or take a course. If you prefer to be at home or alone, write a book on a topic that is important to you, or take up painting or sculpting, or become active in an online community.
- Whatever you decide to do, make sure you do something that enriches your life. If you're passionate, it's very attractive and others notice it right away.
- Be proud of what you have achieved, and have faith in what you can do. Confidence is something many people admire, so don't be shy about what you've accomplished.
Step 3. Be nice
Treat others as you would like to be treated yourself. It sounds like a cliché, but it's really true. If you want others to treat you with care and respect, you should start by treating others that way. People are more likely to fall in love with people with beautiful personalities, who are polite and kind to others.
Step 4. Show your flaws
Do not only show your good qualities to the other person, but also your less good sides. For example, if you're active and fit now, but used to be rock-solid, tell the other person about your transformation. By mentioning your shortcomings you show your true self and he/she will appreciate you even more.
Method 2 of 6: Prepare for emotional hurdles
Step 1. Be emotionally accessible
Relationships can be difficult. Before you let someone fall in love with you, make sure you're ready. If you're too preoccupied with a previous relationship, more interested in dating, or just don't want to commit yet, don't try to make someone fall for you.
Step 2. Make sure this is the one for you
Think about how you feel for the other person. Do you love him/her? You have to make sure that you are in love with the other person, and not just love him/her as a good friend. It can sometimes be difficult to tell the difference. If you're not in love yet, take it easy. If you two belong together, the feeling will develop.
Step 3. Think about your motives
Think about why you want a relationship. Do you want someone to be in love with you so that you feel better after your previous relationship ended, or because you want to make someone jealous? Then it's a bad idea to let the other person fall in love with you. That doesn't take into account the genuine feelings he/she may have for you. If you want the other person to fall in love with you because you want to have a long-term relationship where you want to support each other, then go all out.
Step 4. Think about your goals
Set long-term goals for the relationship. If you can't envision this relationship to last, it's useless to let someone fall in love with you. That is emotionally mean to both yourself and the other. There is nothing wrong with going out together; if you like dating someone but don't see a long-term relationship in it, just enjoy it as it is, and don't try to take it more seriously. You don't have to be in love to do fun things together.
Step 5. Believe that there are other people too
Sometimes we have feelings for someone that are not reciprocated. That's okay. You don't have to feel like this is the end of the world or that there's no one else on Earth for you. There are so many nice people on this planet, after all. If someone doesn't reciprocate your feelings, then you are not meant for each other and you would never have been happy together. Before you know it, you'll meet someone else and wonder why you've been so sad.
Don't try to pretend to be someone else to win you over. Make sure the person you want to be with suits you the way you are
Method 3 of 6: Developing a bond
Step 1. Get to know the other person better
The first step in getting someone to fall in love with you is getting to know them better and getting them to know you. That takes time and energy, because you have to ask the right questions and listen carefully.
- Ask what the other person wanted to be in the past, and what he/she wants to do now. Then you learn more about the dreams and wishes of the other person, and what he/she wants out of life.
- Ask about his/her likes, dislikes, interests, hobbies, and goals.
Step 2. Share the other person's passion
Show interest in what interests him/her, and learn to appreciate the things that make him/her happy. Don't pretend you care, because people often see right away that you don't mean it. Try to see the interests through the eyes of the other and share in the passion. Then you can bond, and that's a first step on the road to love.
Suppose the other is a big fan of a sport you don't know, ask them to tell you more about it, or ask them to teach you. Or if he/she likes a certain kind of music, listen to it together and see which songs you like too
Step 3. Treat him/her like a hero
Make the other person feel like a hero when they are with you. Let him/her help you with your homework (so that he/she feels smart), ask for personal advice (that makes him/she feel useful) or ask for help with certain things he/she is very good at (so that the other can show how much experience he/she has with it). Asking for clothing advice or asking for help opening a jar are also ways to make the other person feel useful.
Step 4. Create trust
Trust is a very important part of a healthy, long-term relationship. Learn to trust the other person and show that you trust him/her, in words and deeds. Also make sure that you show the other that you are reliable.
- If the other person tells you a secret, don't tell. If you discover something he/she is ashamed of, don't tease him/her about it.
- Share your secrets with others and show sides of yourself that no one else knows. Show your vulnerable side and let him/her comfort you.
Step 5. Support the other in difficult times
Providing support is very important to create real love between two people. Most people seek a relationship because they want support from someone. Being able to support and nurture the other person can go a long way in making the other person fall in love with you.
Sometimes you can support someone just by listening, or by putting an arm around them. But other times you may need to do more. For example, if the other person is having a hard time at school, you can help them study
Method 4 of 6: Loving the other person
Step 1. Respect the other
Respect is important in a love relationship. Always give the other person the opportunity to talk and express his/her opinion, and listen carefully. Respecting the other person also means that you should never give him/her reasons to think that you are being unfaithful. Flirting with people is fun, but if the other person notices that you are flirting with everyone on the street, they may not want to commit to you.
Step 2. Be a good friend
You should treat the other as you would a good friend. That means you should always be there for him/her and be selfless in your actions. But be a good friend because it makes the other person happy, not because you want something from him/her.
Step 3. Remember that you are two separate people
No one wants to feel suffocated in a relationship. That's why some people hold the boat off a bit. If you give the other person the freedom to do the things he/she likes, he/she will love you more. Respect the independence of the other; don't try to change him/her and don't violate his/her privacy. Everyone is entitled to his/her secrets, or things that are only his/her own.
Step 4. Love the other just the way he/she is
Be happy with the other person's good things and try to accept the things that annoy you. Don't try to change the other.
For example, don't force the other person to change his/her diet or personal style. If you're suggesting things and he/she says "no", respect that and don't start over
Step 5. Respect the other person's need to be alone
Being alone and personal space are important to both of you, so don't expect the other to give that up for you. Have respect for the other person's personal space, and don't snoop in his/her stuff or room.
Do things alone or with your friends a few times a week. Don't force the other person to spend every minute with you because they may feel suffocated
Method 5 of 6: Making sure the other person stays in love
Step 1. Appreciate the other
Never take the other person's love for granted. If the other falls in love with you, you will have to maintain that love. The best way to keep someone in love with you is to never, ever take the other person for granted. Show the other person every day that you appreciate him or her.
For example, say "thank you" when the other person does something nice for you. Make it genuine and make it specific. For example, "Thank you for unloading the dishwasher and making me coffee this morning! I really love that."
Step 2. Spend time together
If you're in love, and the relationship seems stable and good, that doesn't mean you don't have to put in the effort. Keep going out together, buy each other flowers, and so on. This shows that you still care about the other person and that you want to put in the effort for the relationship.
Most importantly, say you love him/her every day
Step 3. Keep it exciting
Don't always do the same things. Routine can be enjoyable, relaxing, and comfortable, but it's important to occasionally break out and do new, exciting things together. This shows that you are still interested in the relationship and that your life is not stagnating because you are now together. It can also help to regain some of the tension from the beginning.
- Do something more challenging, such as skydiving or bungee jumping. Take a dance class or learn to paint together.
- Learn something new together, like furniture making, so you can fill your house with things you made together.
- Organize a game night where you can laugh together and compete with each other.
Method 6 of 6: The Beginning of a Romance
Step 1. Find someone who suits you
When you find the right person, you increase the chances of falling in love, being loved, and staying in love. The other must be ready for a serious relationship, be able to deal with the emotional stress that a relationship can give and suit you. If he/she doesn't meet those requirements, you're wasting your time and you could get hurt.
Think about whether you're a good match: do you like the same things? Do you have the same goals in life? People who are well-matched often deal with difficulties in the same way and have the same priorities in life
Step 2. Make an appointment
Don't beat around the bush to make an appointment: be straightforward and very clear. Suggest doing something fun and be honest about why you want to. Taking control of the situation shows that you are confident, and many people love that.
Say something like "Hey, I'm excited to go to the zoo this weekend, and I'd love for you to come with me."
Step 3. Be nice company
You should be nice company on the first date. Also before the appointment you should try to take every opportunity to show how nice you are.
- Choose an activity that you both enjoy. If you don't know each other that well yet, pick something that will give you something to talk about: like a movie. If you already know each other better, choose something that is new to both of you. Then he/she sees you in a different way.
- Try an exciting outing, such as an action movie or an amusement park. It has been proven that these kinds of activities make people feel a certain attraction.
- Pay attention to what the other person is saying and write things down. If you come up with a surprise with something that he or she casually said a while ago that he or she would like to have, his or her heart will undoubtedly melt and you are clearly showing that you really care about him or her.
- Just say what you feel about him/her. Maybe it's mutual. If he/she doesn't say anything, ask. Pay close attention to whether he/she rejects you or panics. Do this at the right time!
- Making someone fall in love with you is impossible. If you do everything discussed above and the other person still isn't in love with you, then that person probably isn't capable of loving you and you wouldn't make a good couple together. Sometimes two people just don't fit together, even if one has very strong feelings for the other. You may not want to hear it, but if the other person simply can't reciprocate your feelings, it's best to end the relationship.
- You can't force something as important as love, and it usually doesn't happen overnight. The best kind of love arises unexpectedly, and if it is destined, it happens naturally. Trying to make someone fall in love with you is likely to backfire.
- Don't act pushy or clingy towards someone who has rejected your feelings. If you have to put in too much effort to convince someone to like you, that person isn't worth all that effort and will probably never like you. If you try too hard to get into a relationship, people will just think you're weird and scary and you'll just drive people away with it.
- Don't believe that you can make someone fall in love with you with a certain chemical spray or with a certain food. Although it has been scientifically proven that such things affect the part of our brain that controls these kinds of feelings, those chemical substances will never force someone to fall in love with you. There is no such thing as a "magic potion" that works for everyone all the time.
- Try to fit in with your partner as best you can and do your best for him/her. And if it doesn't work, all you can do is move on with your life.