Do you really want to be really cool in high school? Some think people are born cool -- but that's just not true. You can learn to be cool, and until then you can pretend. Learn some cool strategies first so you can figure out how to be cool while you're in high school.
Part 1 of 2: Climbing the high school social ladder
Step 1. Befriend popular people
One way to be cool is to befriend the popular people at school. This helps to be accepted by the cool, popular people at school. Once you hang out with the popular crowd, people will start to recognize you.
- Start with someone who is fairly popular and work your way up from there. By starting with people on the lower rungs of the social ladder, it is easier to get to this group. In addition, these less popular people may love that you give them attention. Make sure their day can't get any better.
- Do not pretend. That's definitely not cool. You want to make good friends, not casual acquaintances that you eventually drop. If you start taking that habit, people will start to think about you that way. Be careful not to damage your reputation.
Step 2. Befriend a lot of people
Don't focus so much on a popular clique that you end up not associating with others. There are a lot of people at your school. Make sure you are friendly to everyone! The more people you get to know and the more people you befriend, the more popular and cooler you will be.
- The first impression is always the most important. Show your true self, and don't try to hide who you really are.
- Make friends with people in the classes above and below you. Get to know people in different groups. Get to know the popular children, but also talk to the children from the football team, the drama group and the children who form a band. Making friends and getting to know lots of people will help you look cooler. You will become a lot more famous.
- Getting to know a lot of people can also make it clear to you which group you want to belong to. Becoming part of a social group, whether it's the athletes, musicians, the popular kids or the smart ones, gives you a sense of belonging.
Step 3. Join clubs
One way to be cool and increase your popularity is to join clubs. Choose clubs that interest you, such as the drama club or perhaps the student council. Which clubs are the popular people in? If there are people you'd like to be friends with, try joining the club they're a part of.
- Clubs can be useful for meeting people. When you get involved in club activities, such as theater productions and elections for the student council, it gives you a name, so that people start to recognize who you are. This helps increase how cool you are, because then you'll be that guy from last fall's stage performance, or the girl who was elected secretary for the student council.
- Don't join a club you hate just to be friends with someone. You want to be part of something you can enjoy. Don't fake it because people can see it if you pretend you like something.
- Don't try to fit in everywhere. You are not meant to come across as characterless or as a show-off.
Step 4. Do sports
Most high school athletes are automatically cool, just on principle. Think about what sport is considered cool at your school. Is it basketball, football, rugby or baseball? Try to join a team. Make sure you are willing to put in the time and make the physical effort. Make sure you can play the game. You don't want to humiliate yourself when you join.
- Are all popular girls cheerleaders? Then consider becoming a cheerleader. If they all play hockey, go do that. Make sure you get to know the other players better once you're on the team.
- If you're not interested in exercising yourself, try getting involved in other ways. Go to home games. Many popular groups go to football matches on Friday nights. Come along once. Join supporter clubs and student council meetings.
- Sports are a great way to make new friends and learn teamwork. They also help you stay in shape and are important during your further studies.
Step 5. Share your food
As soon as you go out to lunch or hang out with others, take food with you to share with them. This is a way to start a conversation and interact with other people without too much stress.
However, keep it simple. Don't start baking cookies. Instead, you take a bag of chips and offer it. After opening the bag, casually ask who else wants some. Don't make it too busy. Keep it simple, keep it cool
Step 6. Go to parties
Try to find out who throws the best parties and go there. Go with a group of friends. If you go alone, try to mingle and meet others. Have fun and entertain yourself at the parties.
- Don't drink alcohol or use drugs at parties to act tough. Drugs and drink are prohibited for minors. More importantly, you don't want to be the drunken slut or that figure who is always high and makes a fool of himself. Instead, stay sober so you can keep acting cool and not make a fool of yourself. In addition, it helps to stay out of trouble.
- Don't start having sex at parties to be cool. Sex is only for when you're ready. Doing it with someone because you think it makes you look cool will only end in disaster. Instead, you flirt with people, sometimes date someone, and even kiss. Just make sure you don't end up being labeled as the compulsive suitor or slut.
- Avoid pressure at parties by not drawing attention to yourself when others are doing things that make you uncomfortable. Go to another room if you want. Don't give in to doing things that make you uncomfortable just to fit in with a group.
Step 7. Be kind and sincere to people
Being cool doesn't mean being mean or cruel. Smile at people. Talk to them. Be nice to people who are less cool or interact with groups other than yours. When you go out with someone, make sure you like them. Don't date people just to gain popularity and then dump them. Be a friendly, genuine person so that people like you for who you are.
Step 8. Stick to your principles
When you're trying to be cool, don't give up on your principles. Remember, you have to live with your choices. Things you do in high school can affect your acceptance into college and your future. Don't sacrifice what you think is right just to be cool.
- Make sure you don't get bad grades. Most cool kids aren't the ones who throw the hat at school. They may not necessarily be the brightest or best student in the school, but they do get good grades. The cool, popular kids want to go to good universities because they want good jobs that can earn them enough money. Don't let your desire to look cool come at the expense of your grades.
- Make sure you don't get in trouble. Some cool kids know when to break the rules and when not to. But fighting, using drugs, alcohol and being intentionally rude to teachers is not the way to score cool points. A lot of cool, popular kids are actually the teacher's darlings. This allows them to get away with more than others in the class.
Part 2 of 2: Taking a cool attitude
Step 1. Know that less is more
The key to being cool isn't trying as hard as you can. Cool people don't force anything; they are not needy. While you're working on your cool image, try to take it easy a bit. Don't be too eager or too excited.
- Don't be nervous. When talking to people, stay cool, calm and composed. Don't fiddle with your hair or shirt, and don't bite your lip. Try not to wave your arms. You want to radiate calmness, not jittery energy. Take a deep breath before you speak, then speak slowly and consciously. Try not to say "uhm" too often.
- Be a little distant. This doesn't mean you shouldn't talk to people, be interested, or smile. It just means that you don't wave excitedly when you see the coolest kid in the class. Don't run up to someone to chatter. Stay cool. Nod your head, smile and say hello. Remember -- less is more.
- Don't try too hard to be liked, accepted, or known. Don't worry so much about those things. Leave that obsession to other people. Keep your focus on staying cool, calm and composed.
Step 2. Don't be that loud, obnoxious figure
When you walk around the school, don't yell, yell, or laugh too loudly. You don't want to be that person that everyone rolls their eyes with because they can hear your conversation all the way across the room. Speak at a normal volume. When you smile, don't overdo it. Try not to laugh or snort too hard.
Step 3. Be yourself, but don't overdo it
Being cool is about yourself. Pats, imitators and over-ambitious people are never cool. You want to be unique and yourself, and follow your own interests. However, since you're into being cool, make sure you don't overdo things. High school has never been kind to those who withdraw into their own world. Better save such things for college.
- Unfortunately, this can mean suppressing certain aspects of yourself. Do you like manga, video games or pop culture? Death metal, goth culture or veganism? If so, decide how much of your true personality you want to show without alienating your classmates. Will they stop talking to you if you're talking about manga all the time? Are they going to think you're weird wearing all black?
- If you really want to be cool and fit in, don't experiment too much. Part of the key to being cool in high school is not being different.
- Try to strike a balance between being yourself and not chasing your classmates with things they don't understand.
Step 4. Understand that confidence is everything
Think about what most cool people in movies and on television have in common: they're confident. They know they are cool and themselves, and they don't need validation from other people. Confidence helps not to overdo it, because that's definitely not cool.
- Most people do not have an innate self-confidence. Instead, they pretend. Follow their lead until you start to believe in it yourself.
- Use a mantra to repeat to yourself. Say to yourself, "I'm awesome/beautiful/nice/smart/funny/etc." Say it in your head, stick it as a post-it in your locker -- whatever works for you.
Step 5. Use social media wisely
Websites like Instagram and Twitter can help you boost your cool factor. Don't gossip about other people on Twitter. Instead, make sure your tweets are funny and interesting. Be witty. Don't flood your feed. Instagram can be another great way to collect some cool points and increase your popularity.
- Post messages when you know people are online. Evenings and Sunday afternoons are good times, because high school students are often not busy with other things.
- Don't post too often. Again, less is more and is even more important here. You don't want to flood people's Instagram feed or bore them. You want to intrigue them with your life. Post once or twice a week. Make sure these are good quality messages. Don't just post pictures of your dinner or your cat.
- Post selfies sparingly. Don't be that girl who always posts a duck-face selfie or that guy who constantly uploads pictures of himself shirtless. Keep the selfies spontaneous, such as when you are in a cool place or out with friends.
- Follow people follow. Like their photos, make sure they know who you are so they can follow you back. But make sure your follower-to-follow ratio is about the same. You don't want to come across as that person who follows everyone without anyone following him or her. Unfollow people who don't follow you back.
- Have fun on Instagram. Post flattering photos of yourself, photos where you're doing fun things, and photos that show you have an interesting life.
Step 6. Dress appropriately
Getting cool doesn't mean you have to follow all the new fashion trends. Instead, look around to see what all the cool kids are wearing. Which fashion is the style at your school? Shop at the fashion stores where the cool kids also buy their clothes and try to imitate what they look like.
- Be careful not to copy the style of others. Add your own personal twist to the outfits. Wear accessories or shoes that you like, choose shirts in your own color or wear styles that you find comfortable. The key to dressing appropriately is feeling comfortable enough and making what you wear your own.
- Don't overdo it with fashion. Dress simply. Too many fashion trends in one outfit makes you look like a mess. Instead, opt for a trendy piece of clothing with an otherwise simple outfit.
Step 7. Maintain good hygiene
Smelling bad, unwashed hair and not taking good care of yourself is not cool. You don't have to have the perfect body, but take care of yourself. This ensures that you show the best side of yourself to your classmates.
You shower regularly. Make sure you're clean, and don't forget your hair and face. Brush your teeth every morning before going to school. Wear deodorant. Don't wear so much cologne and perfume that people can't stand next to you
- Don't be mean and don't gossip; being friendly is the way to enter.
- You may face peer pressure, but if you don't fuss about it and stay nice when you say no, you can still be accepted.
- Try to find out what is considered cool in your school. In some schools sports is cool, while in others being hip is cool. Try to find out what works at your school.
- Make sure you don't use other people just to connect with the popular groups. Be yourself. If they don't accept you, that's their problem.